How to write on an empty wallet

I don't want to repeat myself, but I started this blog, because I write a book and I thought it would be a good idea to write about the processes and dramas a writer faces day by day.

The key to writing a bestselling novel is first of all, writing it. But how do you do that, if all you can think about is paying the bills? A sane person would go look for a secure job immediately instead of hanging on to this idea. I, on the other hand, am insane. Pleased to meet you. Like someone with tunnel vision, I do find myself holding on to this mirage, because I don't feel capable of doing anything else but this.

See, I don't have any passion to pursue a classic career to put it lightly. Economical factors never had any influence in my scholastic history. When I was younger and still had some energy within my bones, I wanted to learn something new about the world. And in the end I really think I did learn some important things at university. Not necessarily career-wise, but life-wise.

Thanks to Philosophy and Theory of Mind I learned something about (sometimes wishful) thinking. Thanks to Statistics I learned something about the exposure of facts by looking at numbers. Thanks to Law and the Department of Forensics I learned something about the morality within me. Thanks to Linguistics I learned something about thought, speech and the obstinacy of the academic system.

I don't ever regret having made my choices. But as sad as it is, to be able to choose what you want to be in life, you either have to be incredibly rich or incredibly stupid, because no one truly can afford it one way or the other. As I pointed out before, I have no assets!

Yet still, I am outraged by this. Envious and judgemental, that's what we are, ladies and gentlemen, everyone, including yours truly, the inhibited writer/lazy ass who thinks everyone but herself is looking at the wrong end of the rainbow to comprehend what life really is all about.