Decay
It’s
another
morning and the wind keeps swirling across the plains. He ruptures the
fibers of earth and tells a tale of adamant goodbyes. I am a branch and I lie broken. The world is waste
as the soil, turning fallow beneath my soles. Everything I touch turns
grey. I am a
pitiful creature, I should have warned you, my friend. I can never be
unbroken. It’s
another morning, and the wind cuts through the sea of bones. The
darkness subsides,
yet not in my heart.
solemn, a harbinger of suffering...
ReplyDeleteIt reads like a prayer.
A moving, mournful story. Thank you for sharing it.
ReplyDeletehttp://stonesoupnovelist.com/2012/07/05/a-scene-the-besjian-in-the-bar/
This could be a poem. It's very lyrical in its cadence.
ReplyDeleteI could picture a godlike creature building his world. Intriguing and terrifying :)
Visiting from Friday fictioneers
This was very poetic. Lyrical. Loved the image you created.
ReplyDeletehttp://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/2012/07/06/friday-fictioneers-lone-rubble/
This is beautiful writing, Daniela.
ReplyDeletehttp://logo-ligi.com/2012/07/06/healing/
Poetic lilt with a dark feel. Very nice.
ReplyDeleteMine is #15 on the Link List - here for others: http://erinleary.wordpress.com/2012/07/05/flash-friday-fiction-11/
Combined with the dilapidated building, this is very effective. Good job. http://kaitlinandmichaelbranch.com/2012/07/06/friday-fictioneers-10/
ReplyDeleteWhat a sad and beautifully written piece. I hope your character hangs on and finds happiness. Nice job!
ReplyDeleteThis sounds like another diary entry and I'd love to know what it was that brought them to the point they are at and how they move away from it to something else. Really drew me in, thanks for sharing it.
ReplyDeleteI'm on the list but for those who happen across, my offering is also here: http://womanontheedgeofreality.com/2012/07/06/reality-brought-forth/
A well crafted story. Haunting and lyrical. Mythic and fey.
ReplyDeleteMust ask if you meant 'plane' or 'plain' in the beginning. Would help with formation of image in my feeble brain pan.
Aloha,
Doug
http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/07/06/nurture-or-nature/
Thanks for bringing that to my attention, I meant plains. I always get them mixed up. :)
DeleteSuper sad! Reflective and utterly sad. Nice work.
ReplyDeleteMy linky: http://unduecreativity.wordpress.com/2012/07/05/desert-warrior/
Very nice!
ReplyDeleteI had the visual of a lonesome being treading across the barren land, each footfall making a dusty cloud that drifts away in the breeze. Any living plants withering as he walks past, a scorpion emerging from it's lair only to dessicate in his presence.
http://thebradleychronicles.wordpress.com/2012/07/06/flash-fiction-friday-lovers-embrace/
Also, forgot to mention, welcome to the party!
DeleteI really love the visual you came up with. Thanks for having me. :)
DeleteI can't even find a favorite phrase, the entire piece was so evocative. The words just sank into me as I read and whatever, whomever, is speaking had me riveted.
ReplyDeletePoetic Prose. I'm not sure I understand it...but maybe that's the point. Beautifully written.
ReplyDeleteIt was haunting and sad, well done.
ReplyDeletehttp://yaralwrites.com
I can feel the forlorn ambiance. Great use of words.
ReplyDeletehttp://ebooksscifi.wordpress.com/2012/07/06/seclusion-by-ilyan-kei-lavanway-for-madison-woods-friday-fictioneers-100-word-flash-fiction/
This reads very much like poetry. It flows well. It's sad, but very good.
ReplyDeleteMy link: "Last Cigarette" http://therantinarkansan.blogspot.com/2012/07/friday-fictioneers-last-cigarette.html
The earth turning fallow, the sea of bones image -- you gave this a really nice pacing and poetic feel. Also the tone of the narrator, sad, lost, but also warning, was really effective.
ReplyDeleteBrian (http://pinionpost.com/2012/07/06/kyawe/)
So melancholy and romantic together. I can feel his soul whither and the parallel description of his surroundings makes it all so powerful.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful.